These are my confessions...

1. Pregnancy versus baby... toss-up.  I got more sleep being pregnant, but I don't miss the tummy and I LOVE sitting on the floor and picking things up just fine again and I LOVE seeing the little guy that was inside of me for so long!
2. I am 10,000 times more hormonal after having the baby.  I cried everyday for the first 6 days, mostly because I kept realizing that there was no more just me and Travis.  And sleep deprivation probably helped out the tears too.

3. Sometimes I look at the baby and think, I just can't do this, I don't know what I'm doing, he's probably going to starve, I don't know why he's crying, why can't he talk yet?
4. Finishing out the semester is really hard, mainly because of group projects and trying to find time to work together... but rumor has it that he'll be sleeping through the night before we know it... because as we all know "they grow up so fast." 
5. Nursing is extremely difficult.  I'm taking fenugreek, I've gone to the lactation consultant twice and was told that I most likely do have a milk production problem.  My nipples hurt from trying to pump and nurse more to increase my milk production, but nothing has really helped much.  It's discouraging since all of my friends and family say that they can pump out 8 oz in 1 sitting and I get 1/2 oz in 1 sitting including both sides :(

6. Postpartum recovery isn't very much fun.  I started taking more walks and walking more and this results in more cramping and bleeding.  And peeing and trying to have a bowel movement those first few days, well, let's just say to all the pregnant people, get those stool softeners at the hospital. 
7. Lastly, 6 weeks is way too long to resume activities I've decided.  This includes intimate activities with your significant other. 
8. I had to leave Tristan 6 days after he was born to go to school and take a quiz.  I left him with my mom and I was gone for a little over 2 hours.  It wasn't too bad, but as time goes on it's been harder and harder to leave him.

Now for the good confessional stuff...
1. Travis is an amazing dad (and he's an ironman!!).  Watching him try to play with Tristan and talk to Tristan makes my heart melt seriously.  And it's incredibly sexy, but see #7 above :(  boo.

2. My aunt has been a tremendous help and my mom was down here last week as well to help out.  Travis' family is here this week.  Family is awesome and we couldn't have gotten through some of this stuff without you. 
3. Tristan is the most beautiful, precious baby in the whole wide world.  It's true, you have a baby and you think they're the most beautiful, wonderful thing in the whole wide world.

4. The mom community rocks.  It's a whole new part of life.  For instance, today in the Nordstrom's women's lounge there were 5 of us breastfeeding our babies and we were all chatting and talking.
5. I've become a stroller mall mom - yikes.  But again, you do exchange knowing smiles and looks with other moms, who remind us all the time that it goes by way too fast.

Thanks to everyone for all the congrats and support - including Travis in his ironman, which he did in 11 hours 15 minutes!  He was awesome! 

I'll try to update a little sooner next time, but well, you know how it is :)